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Home Page > Relationships > Marriage > What Can Be Done About Our Inability to Feel Comfortable When We’re Alone

What Can Be Done About Our Inability to Feel Comfortable When We’re Alone

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Posted: Dec 02, 2006 |Comments: 0
| Views: 163 |

Many of us have planned our lives very carefully to avoid being alone. We may not see our motivation that clearly but we can sure look back and see a long string of relationships of one kind and another. That ought to tell us something. We like company…someone to use as a mirror. It’s possible to see our selves reflected in the approval of others and then dummy up an identity.

Starting out in this life is always a joint experience or we don’t survive. We soon realize that pleasing others is a smart move. Teachers come along behind parents and siblings, and the next thing we know we’re pleasing our scout leaders and church choir directors. They smile…we do it again. They frown and we hear warming bells. We socialize, grow up, marry and are soon seeing ourselves through the eyes of our own children where we continue to look for identity through approval.

Somewhere along the line, hopefully, a healthy person begins to look toward developing an individualistic side. Often it isn’t easy if we meet up with opposition. Others often want to be super-important to us and don’t want us to change our agreeable habits. The trick is to not back down into people pleasing when this happens. Most of us won’t want to pass on becoming a “stand-alone” person once we get started.

One of the ways to pave the way into the often-foreign territory of “selfness” is learning to like our own company. Sometimes we can learn to partner without excessive leaning by going on an occasional retreat with the up-front agenda of trying to see who we are when we are a alone. Do we feel whole and complete?

Most jobs and family situations don’t support the retreat idea. It’s more like “You are going to go where…to do what? Are you planning a retreat from life?” Yet it’s an idea worth considering. Where would we go and what would we do if we were left to our own devices and desires? If we’re not interested in finding out…beware. Fear may be lurking.

Years ago when a death broke up a lifetime relationship, the person left behind was often unable to drive or balance a checkbook. It’s more the exception than the rule now. However, we do have those who are left behind who feel like half of something that is no more…individuals who aren’t individuals, really. To get caught in that situation and to have to begin building an independent entity at that time could be a tall order. The time to work on it is more likely to be supportive if we don’t have to do it in crisis.

If we are uncomfortable alone…don’t like to spend a night away from home…need to ask for the opinions of others before making a simple choice and/or turn to someone for support constantly, it is possible to reverse that trend. We can prepare ourselves for the possible eventuality of being the surviving partner of a long-term relationship by breaking old habits. Take the small ones first. We all have a different list of where we defer and when we lean. Both are charming behaviors at certain times and comforting at others, yet if we see a pattern…it is possible to step up to the plate and break free. We need to scrutinize our feelings and interactions honestly to get started.

As we gain experience, a new identity will come forward…a “stand alone” person that is better prepared for the fickleness of life. In the process we could also become more interesting, not only to others but to ourselves as well.

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Luise Volta’s life has included careers in nursing, teaching pre-school, interior design, Real Estate sales, insurance adjusting, and dairy herd testing. Visit for Relationship Advice.

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Home Page > Health > Know Everything About Weight Loss Camps

Know Everything About Weight Loss Camps

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Posted: Apr 05, 2010 |Comments: 0

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Know Everything About Weight Loss Camps

By: Peter Jacob

About the Author

Peter is an eminent analyst and writer in fitness retreat related topics. He has authored many books on weight loss camps for Liveinfitness.com.

(ArticlesBase SC #2101153)

Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/ – Know Everything About Weight Loss Camps

If there is a global crisis that evokes anxiety in every common minds, that would be obesity. It can be considered as an epidemic without any immediate measures to cure. Educating people about the importance of eating well and practicing enough work outs would be a solution to this outbreak. This procedure is usually initiated in weight loss camps where healthy eating would be combined with exercise and fun. These camps are usually associated with the summer camps where the campers are given advice to make healthy decisions on their own and making them capable of preparing healthier food choices. The weight loss fit camp is mainly for children and teens but there are also several options open to the adults.

The weight loss camps would be hosted in many countries around the world. Through the fitness camps, people would get an opportunity to change their lives through education and activity. Usually these camps would be a bit expensive compared to the summer camps. However, many of them offer scholarships and often the insurance companies would cover some part of the expense.

Since there would be a number of fitness camps promising desirable results, it is important to find out the best one to enroll into. Keep certain criteria in mind to evaluate the fit camps. One of the prominent indicators of the effectiveness would be the persons involved in running the camp and educating the campers. The camp should compulsorily include a registered dietitian, a medical director, a counselor and also a fitness expert. All the camp members should be well trained in healthy living.

There is yet another way to find out how effective the camp would be. Check the methods used by the camp to encourage weight loss. In an effective camp, the process of losing weight would be gradual, by making small sustainable lifestyle choices instead of putting a sudden halt to years of habits within a week or two. Each camper would be treated with specific care by setting realistic fitness goals as well as individualized weight loss plans.

The duration of the camp session also determines the effectiveness of the camp. You can’t expect drastic habit changes and results in one or two weeks. Quite often it takes a month or two to see some desirable change. If the campers end up their session without cultivating new habits and weight loss encouraging progress, there are only few chances that they would follow the plan at home. Some of the best camps offer year-round events even after the camp has ended. This would largely encourage weight loss session for a prolonged period.

The camps are found to be very effective for weight loss in a large way if it had been executed properly. The main aim of the camp should be emphasizing the fact that exercise is fun and nutritious foods are not always tasteless. The camp support members should be understanding and non-judgmental along with being firm and strict. It usually takes a long time and effort to change the ingrained habits and here the counselors need to be supportive and encourage the camper to try their best without feeling down at occasional setbacks in their goals. In an effective camp, the campers would be given tools with which they can continue weight loss sessions and maintain a healthier lifestyle.

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Peter is an eminent analyst and writer in fitness retreat related topics. He has authored many books on weight loss camps for Liveinfitness.com.

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1. Employee Lounge vs. Staff Room
I’ll tell you what these places usually look like, and it’s not pretty. They’re usually really small with white walls and the blandest furniture you can find. Tables and a few chairs, sink and a 20-year-old fridge (that hasn’t been cleaned in as long), a rusty toaster, some magazines from five years ago and possible a red microwave (someone made a creative attempt, once). It’s not exactly a place you’d like to retreat to, so how can we make it better? We want it to be a place where you can relax, take a break and entertain yourself so that you can be at your most productive when you are working.

Get a TV and some multiplayer video games (perhaps even Singstar or Guitar Hero) so your staff can interact when they are relaxing. Get comfortable and colourful furniture (it doesn’t have to be expensive) and make the place feel warmer. Allow people to be creative by having colour-in books (yes, even adults like them), puzzles, soduku and crosswords around. Ask your staff what they like to read and subscribe to a few different magazines. Let your staff bring things from home to decorate the place and make it feel more at home. Buy a real coffee machine that makes above average coffee, but does not require a barista to operate it.

2. Encourage New Ideas
People tend to be less loyal or care less about a business they have no investments in; so let them take ownership of it. Encourage people to share their ideas, always be open and remember to take your ego out of the picture (if you are one of those people who only really likes what comes out of your own mouth). Implement and give praise and you may find that your team starts to feel more like it’s their business too. And if they see it as their own, or even partly as their own – they will begin to treat it differently.

3. Health and Exercise
A healthy team is a productive team and there are countless studies arguing how poor health impacts performance both directly and indirectly. Arrange seminars and corporate fitness and health programs to not only make your team a stronger unit, but a healthier and more productive unit as well. Not only that, unhealthy staff does not cope well with stress and are more likely to burn out. And by the way, do not exclude yourself from these arrangements either; it would just enforce an “us and them” attitude among your team. Clearly you can never force anyone to take part in these programs, but if they show no interest to do so you need to ask yourself why that is.

4. Inspirational Workplace
We cannot be as creative with our office space as we are with our employee lounge (former staff room), but there are certainly things we can do to make it less sterile. Allow your staff to personalise their desks to some extent with personal items and photographs. It won’t look odd to any visitors or clients coming by, but it will make their space feel more like home. You could also create so-called Mood Boards (make it a team building exercise!) on A3 paper, frame them and put them up around the office. Not only did you allow your staff to decorate the place, the Mood Boards mean something to them and serves as an inspiration every day they come to work. Keep them dynamic too, if you’ve had them for six months, take them down and rearrange them.

5. Running Errands at Work
What if people could accomplish some of the errands they have to do in their spare-time, while at work, without impacting their performance? Surely this depends on what your staff’s individual needs are, but several things could be coordinated for their benefit and here are a few examples:

Have a dry cleaner come to collect and deliver their laundry. Not only is it convenient, but you are likely to get a group discount as well. Arrange for a physician to come around and do staff check-ups once every three, six or twelve months. Get people to plan and compile a grocery list and have it delivered to the workplace right before closing. Home delivery is usually only restricted by order amounts, so if you get a few people together there is no additional costs as well as you are less vulnerable to impulse purchases as you’re not standing in the store hungry or with kids.

Obviously it doesn’t take a billion-dollar business do great things for your employees. And even better, people who love their workplace will not only rave about it (improving your image), but they are more likely to perform better and less likely to change jobs – even if they are offered more money. Lifestyle trumps a little (and often even a lot) more cash in your pocket!

Read more on Santa Cruz Sentinel

Read more on Contra Costa Times

Most Recommended Tips for Losing weight without forgetting about Fasting Health http://www.dietbuzzer.com/blog/category/protein-diets

 Because most people are looking for ways to lose weight quickly and without many changes in life style, specialized companies have appeared on the market trying to make a profit out of this. Their recipe for success is to come up with something that can be called a Fasting Miracle. What is a Fasting Miracle? When you watch an ad about a diet product, you will usually be introduced to a Fasting Miracle meaning a person that has lost something like twenty pounds in three days with practically no effort, just by swallowing the three pills that are advertised.

There is no television channel that does not run at least one ad including a Fasting Miracle. And then, there are all sorts of stories about movie or pop stars that have gone through such a Fasting Miracle themselves. They claim they have lost a lot of weight without making too much effort. They just drank this or that tea or took an amazing pill.

What we don’t think about is that such a Fasting Miracle is more the result of the money invested in the story than the result of the efficiency of the product. The company that produces the diet product will pay the star a lot of money to talk on all the TV channels about their Fasting Miracle. Whether you as a viewer choose to believe in a Fasting Miracle or not, is entirely up to you, but it can have serious consequences on your health.

Most Recommended Tips for Losing weight without forgetting about Fasting Health http://www.braceletbreastcancer.com/category/cancer-bracelet/

 What you must know when you begin a diet is that there is no such thing as a Fasting Miracle. Any diet that works takes effort and patience. You usually have to begin with something that is called Detox Fasting. In this case you do not actually lose weight, but your body eliminates all the elements that are not useful and act as a slow and effective poison. You will have to drink a lot of liquids and stop eating some of the things you are used to, so you will have plenty of time to understand that a Fasting Miracle is a lie. The mere fact that there are people who have to go to a Fasting Retreat to diet under supervision is also a sign that a Fasting Miracle does not happen in real life.

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